How do you overcome failure can tell a lot about yourself.
Even though, we all talk about about overcoming failure, and the stories of overcoming failure, doing this is not a piece of cake. Failures are one of the most common phenomenon of life. Specially when you’ve failed in something that you really worked hard before, it’s not easy to get over it.
Because, that’s when all our trusts and hopes as well other’s get broken. Some people just change their colors. And others who would hate us already starts showing their true colors by showing extreme hate.
Failure is also one kind of heartbreak that breaks our heart in pieces. Even though we all know that, failures are obvious in order to succeed in life and despite of knowing about all the surprising benefits of failures , we still cannot help feeling broken and it becomes hard for us to overcome failure.
No matter how much you claim to be a mentally strong person, even if you’re used to it, but if you’ve really invested efforts this time, it’ll still hurt. Literally everyone is indifferent to these disappointments.
However, no matter how painful these experiences are, settling down with all these emotions is never something we aim for. But, rising above these feelings and overcoming failure is much easier said than done.
In this article, we’ve provided you with 11 outstanding and practical tips on how to overcome failure. So, keep reading to the end!
Keep Yourself Busy but DON’T Escape
It’s normal to feel the pain very every now and then specially when it hasn’t been so long since you’ve gotten the scars.
However, you definitely don’t want to find yourself crying and sobbing over the same thing for days. Even the more you’ll give attention to this silly thing, the more it’ll take control over you. Making you an absolute freak. Acknowledging your feeling and helping yourself to heal doesn’t really mean giving all your attention to the same thing.
Especially when you’re more focused on misery .
So, the best you can do is to trick your mind into having the flow state. Which you can do by keeping yourself busy doing the things you love to do or obsess over. Though, it’s not effortless to get to that flow state, but at least you can try.
Also, make sure that you’re not doing it on a level that you’re doing it just to escape. Escaping and not accepting real life is never the goal. You’re not supposed to be work alcoholic and forget about all the things going on in your life. The goal is to stop you from going insane by thinking about all those miseries 24/7 and ruining your life even more. Also, according to Life Sorted, “Staying busy is a great way to combat negative emotions and stay positive”
Find out What’s Really Bothering You
To be Honest, failure isn’t always the thing that can bother someone. Even though being sad and frustrated for not being able to succeed is a completely common and normal incident. However, in most cases it’s just the outer view of what we see. But, you see, the human mind isn’t so weak that it can be depressed just over a failure.
There’s often a different reason which somehow relates to this and makes us delusional. In my case, I personally don’t feel super sad when I fail as I know that I’ll soon be backed up. But I do feel sad whenever I think about the delusional reactions on the face of my loved ones.
And there can be other reasons happening in your case too. It can be that you think so much about what other people think of you. Or, you’re just anxious about your future. Or, maybe it’s your own unrealistic goals and perfectionist mindset that’s hurting you. These are just some of the commons.
But, there can be different reasons too. In order to overcome failure, you first need to figure out what’s hurting you really deep inside. If you’re anxious about your future, just know that it doesn’t even exist yet. There’s only an uncertain demo of your future that you’ve created in your mind. So, you better make sure that you’re not being driven by the demo of your delusional future that you’ve in your mind right now and actually create a good one for yourself.
Don’t Be a Perfectionist but DON’T Lower Your Ambition
As I said in the previous point, sometimes your own unrealistic goals might end up hurting you.
So, are you going to lower your goals ?
There’s a huge difference between being a perfectionist and maintaining healthy goals. You may study hard and look forward to having a much better grade than before or you can also aim to be one of those top notch students.
However, if you’re constantly striving to stand 1st and think that otherwise you would be nobody, then I must tell you that your path is wrong. You better give your best and try to be there where you want to be . But, just thinking that, if you don’t get this, then you’re done with your life, or being extremely upset when you aren’t there is just a form of self destruction.
When you see people obsessing over having the best, you might think that they’re extremely ambitious or aspirin. But, it’s not an aspiration or doing this isn’t a flex either. It’s just an extreme form of perfectionism that can happen to be a reason behind one’s self-sabotage that will never let you overcome failure.
You see, even the best player in the world has no record of winning every game they ever played in life. It’s just impossible. So, you better lower your unrealistic expectations on yourself to overcome failure before it makes your self worth go down and eventually destroy you.
Acknowledge What’s in Your Control and What’s Not
There are different forms of time wasting. But, I think the biggest wastage anyone can ever make is just wasting their time, energy and emotions by thinking about the things that are not in control.
You’re not supposed to avoid all your responsibilities and do nothing in order to have success. But, what you’re also not supposed to do is to take everything personally and think everything is your responsibility.
You can give your heart and soul , become extremely hardworking and maximize your time by setting up the best priorities every day. But what you can’t control is, most of the time, the result itself . Also you can control your emotions while having failures in your life, but you can’t control other people’s perceptions about that. You don’t have any idea if you’re really going to succeed even the next time. But, what you can do is keep trying, keep pushing and never giving up.
So, while having a failure make sure, instead of crying over the things you can’t control you focus more on the things that are actually within your hand to overcome failure
Take a Break
According to Professional Super, “Taking time away from our everyday duties can reduce stress and improve your mental health and wellbeing”
Even though people always keep talking about pushing through and never stopping for a moment, not many people talk about one of the most essential parts of the process where you overcome failure which is -Taking a Break.
Every time, you’ve a failure, or a bad incident going on in your life or maybe when you become outlooked or talked about by others for any reason, those things always can have little to much negative impacts on your mind. In our daily hassles and busy life, we don’t always get time to analyze all these little emotions. But, still they stay somewhere in your mind and by time, these tiny emotions keep getting accumulated and slowly ruin your mental health.
And being physically healthy is just not enough to fight every hard situation in your life. So, in these cases when you feel exhausted and burdened by your emotions, take a break.
Taking a break does not necessarily mean throwing the towel. Go on a vacation, Re-analyze your true cores and desires and what you really want to have out of your life. Spend time with people who inspire you, trust you and boost you.
Once you feel well enough, it’s time to be back to business and start trying again.
Don’t be influenced or fooled by other people’s perceptions
There are times when you feel like a failure. But, the fact is, they don’t always exist in reality, sometimes they’re just all in your mind.
See, Basically we’re the ones setting up standards and definitions of failures and success in our life. That’s why, many become happy when they barely pass an exam or get 1000 views or likes on their videos, reels or blog posts. Whereas, there are people that the top notch marks and millions of views cannot satisfy them.
I’m not saying that you should expect the bare minimum or stop trying once you’re at a good level. You should consider your own abilities. No one knows about you better than you know about yourself. You know where your limit is or you’re just limitless. You know only how high you can fly.
Besides, before striving to be better, you’ve to learn to have contentment. However it’s not easy to feel that feeling of contentment if you’re constantly being influenced by other people’s perspectives.
For instance, we often see on social media, people defining success are having a massive palace, 2-3 big cars, having a Lamborghini and Mercedes at your garage, having thousands of money in the bank account, also owning a pretty face with many people chasing you.
That’s what most people call success nowadays. But, it’s just their own perception. Before you aim for something to accomplish, you should first ask yourself what success really means to you.
The same happens while failing at something. Many people might act like your life is over. But it’s just what they felt or feel about their own life and it by any means doesn’t relate to your life at all.
Be Confident about Your Mistakes
You know what, sometimes you can be the one allowing and provoking others to disrespect you and hurt you..
Yes, you read that right. And you do this by lacking one most important quality which is confidence.
As I said already, there’re things that are out of our control. The mistakes we already made are also one of them. Which means mistakes we already made are quite unchangeable and a part of our life.
But, instead of accepting it just like we do in most unchangeable cases, we become insecure of it. Firstly we shame ourselves in our head by the negative self-talk. Moreover, some people shame themselves publicly by joking about their mistakes and themselves. Some like to call themselves a loser as a form of kidding and then laugh at their own jokes.
But, clearly it’s not funny when you do this to yourself. It’s just ridiculous. And slowly people start making fun of you too. So what to do instead?
Well, be confident about your mistakes. Don’t act like you’re an utter dumb when you just made some dumb mistakes that most people do. Even when people try to mock you, don’t give them a chance. Just be confident and have an attitude that tells them that you’ve given up yet and not everything is over. It’s just the beginning and you’ll eventually succeed.
Don’t Let Your Mind Fool You
Well, let’s just confess that often our brain makes silly decisions and has silly thoughts even though we know what the reality is.
And, normally you can recognize when your brain is doing that. But, the times when you’re already so much disappointed in yourself, you automatically start listening to what your brain tells you. Be it positive or negative.
And that’s why a massive amount of people have severe depression because of these failures they face in their life.
When we’re in our normal state, we all accept the fact that “Failure is the pillar of Success ” or “Bad times won’t last forever”. But, when faced with failures in our own life, we tend to forget it all.
Though we know it’s not the end, your brain tells you “You’re done with your life”. Though you know that people don’t really care that much , Your brain tells you “Everybody will laugh at you”. We all face these issues. Only a few people can trick their mind into being positive while going through these hard times.
But, what you’ve got to do is to stop your brain from fooling you. Even if you can’t be positive, Just don’t be fooled. In this way, sooner or later, you’ll be able to overcome failure.
Change Your Companies
When you fail or go through a bad time, sometimes it can be influenced by your close circle of friends too. Or, maybe the people you spend the most time with.
However, not necessarily everyone you see is going to appear as dishonest or toxic. Most of the time, there are some hidden evils too. But, what if you find no one who has ever tried to cause any harm to you.
You might think that it’s just not their fault. But, think again. They didn’t do any bad to you, but did they ever do any good to you either? Have they ever inspired you or given you guidelines or ever pushed you to be out of your comfort zone or you just hang out with them because they can make you laugh and you feel entertained and loved.
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One type of friends that not many people talk about are those who never inspire to be better. Suppose, your ambition is high, and then they tell you ironically that you’re like them and you all are the same-DUMB. Or, maybe when you try to take a risk, in the form of giving advice, they advise you to stop as you’ll consequently lose and feel shamed.
BE AWARE OF THESE PEOPLE to overcome failure.
At first, they might seem harmless, but the more you’ll be closer to them, the more your mindset will shift to their level and because of that, you’ll never be able to reach your fullest potential even if you try really hard. I’ve seen many top-notch people going down because of their companies and they don’t even understand.
As a result, if you ever spot someone like this, just ignore them or try to minimize the communication as much as possible so that you won’t be influenced by them anymore.
Find out the Root Cause of Your Failure
When you’ve failed don’t just give all the blame to your fate and bad luck and do nothing. Although, there might be something called fate, but what I personally believe is that it plays less than 1% roles. There’s even a root cause of it. So, find out the reason.
What has really caused your failures? Be honest with yourself to overcome failure.
Is it because you didn’t try your best? Is it because you followed the wrong strategies? Or Is it because you took advice from the wrong people? Is it because you persuaded the wrong things?
Find out the root cause and work behind this to overcome failure and succeed.
Know When It’s time To Let Go
It’s possible that sometimes we just pursue the wrong things. Maybe you don’t love the things you do anymore.
Very often we try to suppress our dislike about something by just remembering that we’ve already invested so many times and eff0rts behind this , so there’s no going back.
But, just like the way of creating something, there’s always an end to it. If you feel like something you don isn’t really meant for you, you always have the option to shift your choice.
Final Thoughts :
The things that are making you stressed so much won’t even matter after some months or years from today. Maybe then you’ll look back and laugh at your own mistakes. You’ll be grateful for how far you’ve come.
And honestly this will happen, I swear. Instead of acknowledging your failures badly, think of the long term life to overcome failure. And obviously don’t wear the black glass of failures full of miseries while visualising your future.
Another #Bonus tip will be, take inspiration from other people who’ve failed in their lives and succeeded. You do not necessarily have to take inspiration from the richest people now who have built giants now. Just find someone who has the same goal as you. Know about their stories, take inspiration and stay inspired and active.
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